Sometimes we box ourselves into a version of us that’s not exactly accurate but to someone else’s expectations (or your own too) and it’s just not who you want to be. AND THAT’S PERFECTLY OKAY TO CHANGE!
I had always sworn I’d never be the kind of girl that gets her nails done, gets those fancy spa facials… heaven forbid waxing… but here I am. I do all those things, and gasp, today I’m wearing a pink sweater and red pants. Okay, well, the sweater is “dusty rose” to be fair, but they are also two colors I had once labeled as totally “out of character” for me. I put that in quotation marks because that’s the “character” I thought I should have.
Anyone that has known me for a while knows I have always been very much a tomboy. So going from dirt stained boot-cut jeans and oversized t-shirts to bright red pants and girly blouses is a big jump for the person I thought I should be. The person I had told myself I was. But why couldn’t fancy red jeans be me too? I didn’t even think it was possible until I changed the way I look at things and actually gave it a try.
Most of us, like me, get so caught up in strict ideas about how we should be and stick ourselves in these little boxes according to those ideas. The sad thing is, the majority of the time we’re doing it to ourselves- we choose to conform to certain real or imagined expectations and build up these rigid box walls around us accordingly. Partly because we think that’s what’s expected of us and it can be oh-so-comfortable. And truthfully, change can be good but it can also be bad. I think one of the most outstanding qualities a person can have is how they adjust to change. In all honesty, when you hear stories told by successful entrepreneurs on how they got their start, you rarely hear them say “Yeah, I had a huge group of people supporting me, they loved all my ideas and thought I was brilliant, and I never changed anything I did!”
Nope. 9 times out of 10 they succeeded by not listening to popular opinion, kept chasing their dreams through great adversity, and changed a lot of things. They stepped out of their box and adapted- tried something completely new. Most of them became something they never thought they would be and learned from the rocky roads they traveled. If you had told my younger self that I would be where I am now, learning what I’m learning, doing what I’m doing, I would have laughed. It has been a huge challenge, that’s true, but I’ve never really been one to sit in a box either. The only reason I stayed there so long was that I didn’t trust myself and thought others knew what was better for me. Because I didn’t think I really had any other options. The longer I was there though, the more frustrated I grew with my life. Which wasn’t healthy at all. During that period I found myself struggling the most, gaining weight, feeling suffocated, and just plain unhappy.
I spent a long time analyzing things before I realized what the problem was. Through that, I was able to let go of all those perceived/existing expectations (mine and those of others) and finally allowed myself to decide who I wanted to be and could flourish in so many ways. Now I’m not afraid to act on my dreams. I always had these budding ideas about the life I wanted, but never gave them light to grow. Tearing down my walls, clearing out my weeds and refocusing on what’s important to me has let me chase my desires like I’ve always wanted to. That’s what I would encourage everyone to do- get rid of the negativity, start trusting yourself, get rid of the “weeds” that choke out your dreams and start stepping outside that box. Or better yet, break those walls down! You never know what good things might happen once you set out on a new journey and embrace change instead of running from it.
Things don’t always go as planned anyway- learning to adapt is one of the toughest things to do, but so important in our fast-paced societies. You never know what good will come out of taking that leap. And sometimes that leap might even be traveling halfway across the world for your first big trip ever. For me, that’s actually what it took to prove to myself that I can do anything I put my mind to. But if that’s a little too much adventure, try starting with a small step first. Instead of saying being quick to say “that’s not me” try switching it up and asking “why couldn’t that be me”?
Thanks for listening!
thatgirlintheglasses 
Leave a comment